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Mistakes That Can Sink Your Marriage with David Hawkins
#4 – Playing God in the Marriage: Shame-based communication triggers defensiveness, resulting in angry retorts or withdrawal.
#5 – Kicking a Dead Horse: Too frequently, spouses dredge up past offenses and use those against their spouse.
#6 – Living in the Trenches: This isn’t war; you’re on the same team.
SO - you should –
#4 – Avoid lecturing language such as “I can’t believe you. .” “You always..” “You never..” “How ...

We’re looking at the 3rd stage of the spouses recovery after the disclosure of the affair – The Anguish Phase. There has to be a release – a time when she can say,”I do not need my spouse to survive.” “It is a critical crossroads because the spouse needs to see that, with God in her life & her feet on the ground of reality, she can survive without the infidel. That means she has options, & options promote a ...

Today we will look at Phase #3 of what the affected spouse goes through after the discovery of the affair. The 3rd Phase is Anguish – Grieving the Loss. During the anguish phase, some recovery can begin. But it won’t be steady progress–rather; it will probably be 2 steps forward & 1 step back. It’s a rocky time emotionally, but that’s part of the normal process of grieving the losses; loss of trust, of the once-pure marital relationship, & so ...

The 4 phases that the affected spouse goes through after the discovery of an affair – first the AWARENESS Phase which we talked about last week. Today we will talk about Phase 2 – ANGER. “At discovery, the spouse’s emotions are usually intense. The anger, hurt, bewilderment, betrayal, and numbing shock are almost overwhelming. The betrayed spouse will be angry, & she needs the freedom to ventilate her rage. The language of anger is never pleasant; however, it is not ...