Books

 

Avoiding the Greener Grass Syndrome.

Nancy C. Anderson. Grand Rapids, MI: Kregel Publications, 2004. A brief, easy read with lots of practical suggestions that this couple has implemented to restore and protect their marriage after her affair.

 

 

My Husband’s Affair Became the Best Thing that Ever Happened to Me.

Anne and Brian Bercht. Victoria, British Columbia, Canada: Tadford Publishing, 2004. This is the story of a couple who appeared on the Oprah show in 2005. Besides sharing their personal journey, there are a number of helpful suggestions and resources for your marriage. Anne also offers personal telephone consultation regarding affairs, and together they do marital enrichment seminars across North America.

 

The Anger Workbook.

Les Carter, PhD, and Frank Minirth, MD. Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson Publishers, 1993. This is a very practical, thought-provoking workbook for those struggling with anger in their marriage. Spouses will understand the influence of unmet needs and family of origin influences on their behavior and, best of all, will be able to choose healthy responses that genuinely reflect their heartfelt desires.

 

No Stones: Women Redeemed from Sexual Shame.

Marnie Ferree. LMFT, Fairfax, VA: Xulon Press, 2002. This is the only book w/workbook that I recommend for women who are attempting to recover from female sexual addiction. Using her own story as a springboard, the author lays out the journey of recovery for women. Marnie also provides intensive weekend seminars through a group called Bethesda Workshops.

 

Not “Just Friends”: Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity after Infidelity.

Shirley Glass, PhD. New York: The Free Press, 2004. This is an easy read and a practical, well-researched book on the topic of emotional and sexual affair recovery. Dr. Glass appeared on numerous radio and TV talk shows right up until her death in 2005.

 

Redemptive Divorce.

Mark Gaither. Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson, 2008. One of the most positive, practical, directive Christian books for difficult marriages since James Dobson’s Love Must Be Tough.

 

 

 

Shattered Vows: Hope and Healing for Women Who Have Been Sexually Betrayed.

Deb Laaser. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan Publication, 2008. This is THE book for women. It contains all that Deb has learned, both in her personal journey of recovery and through helping wives over the last twenty years.

 

The Pornography Trap.

Mark Laaser, PhD. and Ralph Earle, PhD. Kansas City, MO: Beacon Hill Press, 2002. Both men come from a faith-based background and have considerable experience working with those trapped by pornography. Their heartfelt compassion, coupled with practical direction, provide a beacon of hope to the sexually addicted.

 

 

Unfaithful: Rebuilding Trust after Infidelity.

Gary and Mona Shriver. Colorado Springs, CO: Cook Communications, 2005. This is the biographical story of a couple who set about to repair their broken marriage after Gary’s discloser of his affairs. The back and forth conversational style is very helpful to both spouses.

 

 

Forgive and Forget: Healing the Hurts We Don’t Deserve.

Lewis B. Smedes, PhD, New York: Harper Collins, 1984. This is the classic Christian treatment of forgiveness. The fact that it has sold over a half million copies is a testament to its beauty, practicality, simplicity, and sensitivity.

 

 

Getting Past the Affair: A Program to Help You cope, Heal, and Move On—Together or Apart.

Douglas Snyder, PhD., Donald Baucom, PhD., and Kristina Coop Gordon, PhD, New York: The Guilford Press, 207. Collectively these three researchers and clinicians have over 100 years of experience in treating difficult marriages. Easy to read, built on the latest research, illustrated by their own clinical experiences, this is a top-notch resource.

 

After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding the Trust Where a Partner Has Been Unfaithful.

Janis Spring, PhD. Hew York: Harper Collins, 1996. This is a practical and compassionate book from the secular market. In my opinion, it is one of the top three books available on infidelity recovery.

 

How Can I Forgive You? The Courage to Forgive and the Freedom Not To.

Janis Spring, PhD. New York: Harper Collins, 1999. Though coming from a secular mind-set, Dr. Spring offers some wonderful insight into the necessity and practice of forgiveness after infidelity,

 

 

Infidelity: A Practitioner’s Guide to Working with Couples in Crises.

Paul R. Peluso, ed. New York: Routledge Press, 2007. Though designed for the clinician and researcher, this book does provide practical, research-based direction for successful therapy outcomes. It is surprisingly easy to read and quite practical. I especially recommend chapters 4 through 7.