Through all the years of working with couples caught in adultery, I eventually created and collected 60 different homework sheets that sat in stack trays beside my desk.
After having countless couples lose these take home sheets between appointments, leave them in the other car, or forget to take them out of the briefcase, Bible, or purse, I decided to take the “best stuff” and put it in a workbook.
After using the workbook with couples for over 10 years, I’ve come to realize some even greater benefits of collecting and keeping these assignments.
First, I’ve had numerous couples call, years after therapy, to tell me how helpful and healing it was to read what they wrote back in the “early days”.
Second, I have encouraged couples to reach out to other couples who need this particular kind of support and encouragement. Most are willing to do this and find that the workbook facilitates their help and provides focus for the couple that they are sponsoring.
Third, over the years I’ve always encourage couples to share their story with their children at an appropriate age, especially when the children are dating seriously.
Like I said before, infidelity runs in Family trees, and it’s time to break the cycle. Having a workbook with all of its collective homework assignments, recorded healing, and progress, helps the spouses share their story with the children.
Throughout the training experiences I have had with both therapists and peer support folks, I have continually had requests for a “manual”, a set of directions for the user who works with recovering couples. This is my first effort and should you decide to download and use this material, I would welcome your suggestions. I want it to be very practical and helpful to both the professional and to the peer support couple who is helping another on their journey. That is quite a range of training and skill, and I’m sure that some of the material will disappoint one group or the other. Please tell me how well it fits with what you do and what is missing that will make it more effective.